Friday, August 08, 2008

vampires, things and perfect snogging

The Kid was out getting shite-faced with work last night, so I had the flat, and therefore the telly, all to myself. A quick trip to Film Night (way better than Blockbuster - it's totally non-sensical display system rules) meant that I could rent the films I actually wanted to see. Namely, scary/explosiony films for boys.

First up: 30 Days of Night. It's been a while since I've seen a good vampire film, with actual scary vampires in it. I Am Legend, for example, was great UNTIL the vampires arrived. They were silly, with their silly big mouths and shouting. The bad bitey people in 30 Days... look pretty similar, but are infinitely more scarier, and properly brutal. I had to go round the flat closing all the windows and flicking all the lights on. I'll plant a tree later to balance out my carbon doo-dahs.

The only rubbish bit about the film was when I made popcorn and burnt it. How did I burn popcorn in the MICROWAVE?

I still had Rambo and Tell No One to get through. But I've got them for two nights, and didn't want to spunk my film-load too early. So I flicked on the telly, watched a bit of Family Guy (Peter goes back to school undercover as the new cool kid 'Lando' to stop a drug epidemic - licking toads - and ends up dating his own daughter. Genius) and then Alan Carr's celebrity Ding Dong. The show was pretty shit, but he's comedy gold. Makes me larf and larf. He does a good joke about having psoriasis, taking his driving test, emergency stops and a bag of muesli.

Anyway, the show was distracting enough for me to have composed myself after the vampiring. Well, the bottle of red also helped calm my shredded nerves. I went round the flat again turning off lights and finally plucked up the courage to have a wee.

By the time The Kid staggered giggling through the door, I was halfway through The Thing on Sci-Fi. I haven't seen it since I was traumatized by the head growing spider's legs when I was a youngster. But I soldiered on through and loved every minute of it. Is it some sort of metaphor for the cold war? Why was Kurt Russell's beard and hair so enormous? Did we really used to have computers like that? Why did they have three flame-throwers on a science station in the arctic?

Questions, questions...

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